Wednesday, August 29, 2007

I just pitched a remake of citizen cane to the studios starring Bruce Willis as Rosebud.

Bloody Disgusting is saying that Keanu Reeves is signed up to do a remake of the cold war science fiction classic The Day the Earth Stood Still.

In what promises to be a most TRIUMPHANT movie, Keanu Reeves will play Klaatu, a man from another world, and with his robot Gort, they tour the galaxy as Wyld Stallions! EXCELLENT!

You take a movie that was, not only excellent, but so relevant to its time, and update it...what are you going to end up with? Another classic? Unlikely.

More likely is that you end up with a movie that is at best mildly entertaining, but no longer relevant. At worst, you end up with Peter Jackson's King Kong or Tim Burton's Planet of the Apes.

What these film makers SHOULD be doing is remaking SHITTY movies. Think about it, Steven Speilberg remaking Manos: The Hands of Fate. Or, why can't someone remake Wasp Woman (the original was good, but there'd be no one crying if they tried to do a new version of it today, right?). Sure, I know that no one liked them the first time, why give it a second shot, right? Maybe the timing was wrong. Maybe the wrong person was at the helm. (Just think of what Event Horizon could have been like with a competent director.) I just think rather than shitting on the movies I love, maybe someone should take a stab at the movies I hated. I mean, it is all about me after all, isn't it?

4 comments:

Nik! said...

Yes, BUT Keanu!!! ;)

Unknown said...

Yes, because Keanu makes EVERYTHING better...

Not to knock the guy or anything, god knows I like enough of his movies...

Nik! said...

:)

Nickles said...

Event Horizon was genius. Pft.